5 Unexpected Pleasures that Shaped My Sexuality
Lately, like so many people, I have had a bit more time for reflection. I have been thinking about some of the surprising sexual thrills I’ve found in my more than 45 years on this planet. There is absolutely nothing like finding sexual pleasure where you never could have guessed something kinky would exist. Some say reminiscing and feeling nostalgic is a sign of old age. Whatever. I’ve got plenty more firsts and new adventures ahead, and hopefully I can look back and share those, too. I do think there should always be time for reflection back on those things that shape us into who we are, sexually, emotionally and otherwise. This is how we grow, how we know we are evolving and changing as we move through this often-insane journey called life. I know you all have your own great stories, too, and I really wish we were sitting together on this beautiful fall day, sharing over coffee. That would be the best party ever — just imagine the ideas and inspiration.
I suppose some people have grand orgies, shocking BDSM experiences and hot under-table restaurant scenarios in their arsenal of memories. I can’t really claim any of those (yet). These are certainly not groundbreaking moments. They aren’t earth shattering or shocking, but they are mine, all mine. These moments mark core-shaking experiences and they have sparked something sex-life altering deep within me. These are certainly not all of my memorable exploits and experiences and they are in no particular order because I just can’t bring myself to rank them, but these five unexpected pleasures really stand out in my own sexual expansion and desire. Perhaps it will help you have a trip down your own sex memory lane.
Gay Porn Videos in a Nightclub. I’m a small-town girl, who was expected to meet a guy and get married, blah, blah, blah. Okay, well, I did that. It wasn’t a perfect fit. I think the first time I realized that was not too far into married life, when, out of town on vacation, we happened to run into a gay couple who were good friends of ours. They were staying in a gay resort and invited us to join them at the nightclub for drinks and dancing. Well, dancing and drinks were right up my alley and these guys were such good friends. Sadly, that was looking like the most exciting part of the vacation and I was thrilled to have some fun plans. I had no idea what was in store. It’s the first time I was ever really immersed into the sights, sounds, smells and tastes of men on men. Gay men on gay men. I was enraptured. What was it about this? I couldn’t really figure out what was so enticing. I’m not sure if it was the crowd, the music, the variety of soft porn videos on the screens all over the club, or the free and relaxed sexual atmosphere and vibe. Or maybe it was just the gay men. They seemed to have a sexual awareness that the straight men in my life had not. That was a long time ago, and I’m happy to say that I’m finally starting to get to explore time with men who are into men. This brings me to the next one perfectly.
Men in Pantyhose. Not long ago, Allen, my secret mister, and I were discussing his love of nylons and pantyhose. We have known each other more than fifteen years and I knew he loved ladies in pantyhose, tights, stockings…all of it. I knew that right away after I met him. He is into the tactile caress of nylons and that sexy feeling when they are touching the skin. I did not know, until more recently, that he liked to wear nylons as well. I have not known anyone else who has expressed that desire to me before. I was immediately turned on. Needless to say, I purchased a pair of my staple “sex pantyhose” and gifted those to him the next time we met. He put them on, and I was able to share, through touch, how much I enjoyed him wearing the sheer, smooth nylons over his very manly body. A man’s body has extra parts that are enhanced and seem to appear even larger when under tight, translucent pantyhose. Wow. Honestly, I am taken aback as I write this at how much I actually enjoyed it the first time he wore them for me and each subsequent time since then. It’s no wonder why men love women in pantyhose and why it feels sexy as hell to wear them. Men should not be excluded from the sensation and pleasure.
Pregnant Sex. There is literally no segue to this one. There, I said it — pregnant sex is incredible. Ask any mother, except for your own. There is probably no more sexually aroused and lustful time in a woman’s life than when she is pregnant. That’s the crazy irony to that story. Get it in before that kid arrives, ladies. Get it in a lot. I’m not ashamed to say that I indulged in this, quite a bit. The pregnancy ship has definitely sailed off into the sunset for me, but it’s certainly something worth exploring and discussing with more people. And, ladies, for the love of whatever you believe in, take the pregnancy opportunity to explore your sexuality and chalk it up to hormones. Time ticks on those opportunities, so make the most of it. I am so pleased that I took advantage of that time as I can never get that one back again. Oh, and as a sidebar to this one…lactation. You do know how swelled and full they are at the end of pregnancy and after, correct? Double wow. That’s like a peepshow even when you’re fully clothed.
The First Time I Was Blindfolded During Sex. My secret Allen has been such a part of so many pioneering moments of my sex life. I think he knows, and he certainly will after reading this. During one particular tryst, while things were getting really good, he put a blindfold on me and brought me to pleasure I could not possibly have imagined at that time in my life. Being deprived of that sense of sight and the mystery of not knowing when or where he would touch me or even what he was going to do was enough to set me over the edge. The sounds, the touch, the feelings, the strong sensations resonated even more powerful vibrations without being able to see what was happening. This experience opened my mind to so many things — it was restricting and yet so freeing all at the same time. I had never given over such power to anyone else before. Inhibitions dropped and vision was replaced with the ultimate trust of allowing someone else to do as they wish. The trust of putting your purest pleasure in someone else’s mind and hands. For me this was like metaphorically having the handcuffs removed, with a drug-like consciousness and new awareness of pleasure possibilities. I’m only going to touch on it here, but this moved me into a whole new plane that took me through bondage all the way to femdom exploration, where I am a beginner today.
The Gift of a Magic Wand. I’ve been watching porn films, well, let’s just say for a long time. I am a woman, so I think I take them with a bit more realism than do the men in my life. I get it, I really do. Obviously, I enjoy watching them and always have, but really? So many unrealistic expectations. I am not going to get an orgasm by simply using a vibrator with thick pantyhose and a girdle on. I love wearing them, but let’s be real, people. It just isn’t going to happen, and I don’t think I’m the only one. My beau has always loved watching videos using a Magic Wand and really wanted me to have one. I had a few mediocre dildos, vibrators and other toys in the past. They were okay. Some did the job, some didn’t. Some just ate through batteries like they were condoms in a fraternity house. I was a bit skeptical but entertained him when he wanted to take me shopping for my own Magic Wand. We were out of town and found a really nice sex shop. That’s always the start of a good story, isn’t it? They had the rechargable Magic Wand in stock. It is definitely pricey, but he wanted me to have it. We drove home from our trip, and he charged it promptly because he was so excited to use it on me. I was excited, it was something new and he was really turned on by the thought of getting to use it to please me. That’s what I call a win-win going into an evening spent in bed. This appliance (it is really far too disrespectful to call it a toy) was nothing short of monumental! I don’t even have any attachments for it, but the sensations and feelings when it’s controlled by someone who wants nothing more than to hear you moan and scream with pleasure — total euphoria.
And that was only the first time I got to enjoy it. There have been so many excellent solo and partner maneuvers with the Wand since then. After having a conversation about it, my secret Allen asked me to bring it to a night we were going to spend together earlier this year. Speechless. Perhaps the most pleasure I’ve ever experienced in one day was the result of the Magic Wand and Allen (mostly Allen, with a bit of Magic Wand inserted at just the right moment in just the right places). Turns out he is a magician with the Wand. And I will happily take the gift of an attachment if you want to mail me one.
